What Is A Woman Part 7
What Is a Woman, Part 7
In this installment of my series on what the Bible says about being a woman, I am going to begin to discuss the special role God gave women in their home by focusing on the women of Proverbs 31. Before I continue, I want to remind you that when God made us male and female, He made us as equals in worth and dignity ,but complementary in function and purpose. Men and women having different roles in this world was God’s perfect original plan, and was not a consequence of Adam and Eve sinning. I went into detail about this in Part 3 of this blog series. I encourage you to reread that. Blog Posts (anastasihome.com)
In part 4 of this blog series, I gave you a definition of biblical manhood and womanhood. I want to remind you of this here before we continue.
Biblical Manhood:
“At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.”
Biblical Womanhood:
“At the heart of mature femininity is a freeing disposition to affirm, receive and nurture strength and leadership from worthy men in ways appropriate to a woman’s differing relationships.”
These definitions are vitally important in understanding the excellent woman from Proverbs 31 and how to emulate her. In Proverbs 31 we see a woman who is queen of her home. We see a woman who affirms her husband’s leadership and his prominent place in society, and whose focus is on building up those in her home. God gave women a special responsibility to care for and manage their homes. It is an incredible honor, and it has great impact on those around her. The woman of Proverbs 31 will show us that a woman’s priorities should be in this order: God, husband, children, community. A woman is free to go outside her home to earn money or serve as long as she has taken care of her home and family well FIRST. Our excellent woman will be seen buying and selling goods that she has made and caring for the poor in her community. But that is seen against the backdrop of commitment to caring well for her household first and foremost.
Here is the full text of Proverbs 31:10-31
Proverbs 31:10-31 “An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. She looks for wool and flax, and works with her hands in delight. She is like merchant ships; she brings her food from afar. She rises also while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and portions to her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard. She girds herself with strength and makes her arms strong. She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp does not go out at night. She stretches out her hand to the distaff, and her hands grasp the spindle. She extends her hand to the poor; and she stretches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She makes coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies belts to the tradesmen. Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future. She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and bless her; Her husband also, and he praises her, saying: ‘Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.’ Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her the product of her hands and let her works praise her in the gates.”
In this passage you see very clearly that all that she is doing is to please God, and to do good to her husband and children. Verse 11 says that her husband trusts in her. Verse 12 says that she does him good and not evil all the days of her life. Verse 27 says that she looks well to the ways of her household. Verse 26 says that she speaks in wisdom and kindness. Verse 30 says that she fears the Lord.
This God designed plan of being queen of our home is considered extremely radical in our society. Our society degrades a woman’s special role, but God elevates it to be a privilege and an honor. Women have an incredible privilege to mold our children and support our husbands by how we manage our home and how we interact with them. We can make our home a place of joy and order, or we can make it contentious or we can make it a neglected place. We have already discussed in previous installments of this blog that although God’s ways are not our ways, they are the ways that lead us into fulfillment, joy and peace when done heartily for Him. John 5:3 tells us: “For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments, and His commandments are not burdensome.” In Psalm 19, the word of God is described as perfect, sure, right, pure, clean, true and more desirable than gold. It also says in verse 11 that in keeping God’s word there is great reward. If we call ourselves Christians, we must trust God and embrace what God’s word has to say.
In the book Homemaking by JR Miller, this is said on page 68 about having our home as a first priority: “There have been wives who in their zeal for Christ’s work outside have neglected Christ’s work inside their own doors…..While they were winning a place in the hearts of the poor or the sick or the orphan, they were losing their rightful place in the hearts of their own household. Let it be remembered that Christ’s work in the home is the first that He gives to every wife, and that no amount of consecrated activities in other spheres will atone in this world or the next for neglect or failure there.”
To further highlight this idea of women having a special role in their home, here are Bible verses that also support Proverbs31’s picture of the excellent woman.
Proverbs 12:4 “An excellent woman is the crown of her husband, but she who shames him is as rottenness in his bones.”
Proverbs 14:1 “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.”
Titus 2::3-5 “Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips, nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be dishonored.”
Ruth was called a woman of excellence in Ruth 3:11. The reason she was known as an excellent woman was because she sacrificed a great deal to care for her mother in law and to follow God.
How do we practically and daily practice the principle of caring for our home and those in it first and foremost? We have to have the right attitude (see blog #4 in this series for the fundamental attitude of biblical womanhood). Blog Posts (anastasihome.com) We also need to work diligently to care for our family. In the last installment in this blog, I discussed what the Bible says about work. We need to apply those principles to our homes. For those who don’t know where to start practically on managing a home, I have a whole 7 part blog series on my website on organizing. Blog(anastasihome.com) I cover why we organize, and how to organize our homes, our schedules, our meals and our children’s lives. I hope that can be a good starting place for many of you.
This quote on page 62-63 of the book Homemaking helps emphasize the importance of the practical and prosaic daily tasks of managing a home. “A Greek philosopher, walking at night and gazing up at the sky, stumbled and fell. His companion observed: ‘One should not have his head in the stars while his feet are on the earth.’ There are some wives who commit the same mistake. They set their eyes on romantic ideals and neglect the real duties that come close to their hands, in which the true secret of happiness and blessing lies. They have their eyes and head among the stars while their feet are walking on mundane soil, and no wonder if they stumble. It may be put down as a positive rule, whether among the rich or the poor, whether in a palace or in a cottage, that the wife who would be happy, and make her home happy and permanently beautiful, must work with her hands at the housewifely tasks which the days in turn bring to her.”
I encourage you to consider how you can do good in tangible ways today to your husband and your children. I also challenge you to reject the world’s degradation of a woman’s privileged role in the home and embrace it instead. If you are feeling burdened by past failures in this area, remember that God is a God who forgives us when we ask, and then equips us to be what He has called us to be. Ask for forgiveness and start anew with God's help.
In my next blog I am going to focus on the fearing God aspect of the excellent woman and how that affects every part of her home management.
Verse to memorize in response: Proverbs 14:1.
Please let me know if you have any questions or feedback. You can email me at candice@anastasihome.com